My approach to therapy
One of my trainers used to say; “we are wounded in relationship, and so too are we healed in relationship”. I believe that counselling, quite simply, is a process whereby one person offers their respectful presence and attention to the other, acting both as a mirror and as a translator of possible unconscious messages and demands. I don’t have the answers, but I am skilled in helping you find your own answers, by rediscovering your inner compass.
At the heart of every meeting is my active and attentive listening. You tell your story, I listen, I mirror, summarise, draw together some threads into a bigger picture, and may sometimes give you a gentle challenge. I’m not the kind of therapist who just nods and says hmm all the time.
Your story is the one that takes centre stage, and you don’t have to take responsibility for me, my feelings, or my thoughts. For some people this is almost the most challenging part, to be given such a starring role in their own life narrative, with no one trying to steal the limelight.
I am genuinely interested in the things that give your life meaning. And a lot of my professional development in the later years centred around existential issues. I believe that every life crisis, every sense of discomfort, or even pain, is an opportunity for healing and greater self love.
And no, I don’t see therapy as a self indulgent process of navel gazing, mud slinging, or ego tripping. In fact, I truly believe that only an emotionally balanced and healthy human being can be of service to the world around them.
Time for an upgrade?
Some people think that it is a sign of weakness to seek help. It actually takes great courage to reach out, and it is also a smart move. Think of all the devices we have. We don’t think twice about upgrading them if they no longer suit their purpose. But when our tried and trusted coping mechanisms no longer serve, we think we’re stuck with the ‘way we are’.
The psyche is not only wise, it has a deep capacity for change, wanting nothing more than to return you to the default setting you were born with, the inner compass that can guide you magnificently through life.
Although counselling is rightfully seen as one of the ‘talking therapies’, I have other tools in my therapeutic toolbox, such as creative drawing, journaling and mindfulness exercises.
I look forward to hearing your story!